The theme of this work is obviously maintaining sexual purity. The authors define authentic manhood from a biblical perspective, and then offer strategies for young men to achieve it. Substantial attention is given to the practice of self-satisfaction and sexual release, with a commendable mixture of promoting absolute abstinence while at the same time offering empathetic encouragement.

The authors then present several techniques to channel visual activity and mental thought processes in a godly direction. Perhaps the best parts of this book, unique to this version, are the two final sections. The first section addresses sexual honor, giving a young man the perspective of a young woman's father. It also provides insight as to what young Christian women really seek in a man, which is far different than what most young Christian men would think. It then closes with a challenge to live a life that is sexually pure. The second section briefly addresses young men struggling with homosexual desires, encouraging them to use the same principles to achieve biblical, heterosexual purity.

I recommend this book highly to Christian fathers with teenage sons, youth pastors, and young single men. If you or a young man close to you is struggling, then this volume will undoubtedly be a great help. This small investment is sure to yield huge dividends!


Finally, straight talk from real people   August 19, 2002
 52 out of 56 found this review helpful

Arterburn & Stoeker do an excellent job of talking straight to the single male. Though the book is entitled Every Young Man's Battle this book deals with the very real sexual struggles of every man that is single. I would highly recommend this book to all men ages, High School on up.

The book finally gives straight talk on the issues of masturbation, soft porn, the wandering eyes, and the issues of lust in our culture. In a world where sexual images and humor crowd our airwaves from radio to television this is a needed tool to stay the battle.

This is not just a book on staying pure, but one that gives real resons for trying to do so. Testimonies of men who have struggled, fallen, and then regained their purity are given throughout this book.

I would encourage every man to read this book, and encourage you to buy extras to share with others who may also be struggling to remain pure.


The Pro's and Con's of this Book from a sex addict   June 16, 2004
 51 out of 62 found this review helpful

This book is ideal for younger teenagers, under the age of 15, as it provides a ton of information on the consequences of things often begun at that age: pornography, masturbation, lust, etc. It is very likely that a kid who has only begun to do these things or hasn't begun to will be profoundly and succesfully effected by the in-depth discussions of this book on the results of sexual impurity. If the seed of impurity has only been newly planted, "Every Young Man's Battle" will unearth it before the roots of its lustful evils can grow deeper.
The book provides many citations from the Bible that deal with sexual impurity. Although people will complain that it contains explicit themes, what do you expect? This is a book that explores the harm and damage of sexual impurity: it is to be expected that such themes will need to be brought up. In fact, the attitude that this book shouldnt be read because it talks about masturbation, etc reflects the problem of parents mentioned in the book who didnt address these issues to the people who tell their stories of becoming sexually impure. It is something that must be addressed.
The authors share many experiences of others in their struggles and shows readers that they are not alone in their sexual impurity. Some of the stories, if ending in success of becoming chaste or maritally chaste, are inspiring. Overall the book is quite helpful.
However, as with most books, it is lacking some things. The book is written from a fundamentalist Christian perspective. If you don't want to hear about people being "saved" and "accepting Jesus" you will probably be annoyed in reading it. It will be helpful to have a faith in God when you read the book, but it is not needed because the authors claim that it is not God, but you, who will have to do the work of becoming pure. The book actually says that prayers are not very effective. I would suggest that the authors consider that prayers can be effective if they are said right: instead of people praying for God to come and wipe away their problems, pray for smaller things. The authors should have suggested concentrating on the smaller things of each day when it comes to prayers: praying that God will inspire you to stop, praying each day that he will help you for just that day (and doing this again and again every day), praying that God will reveal to you your mistakes (something few people do but which is very effective), praying that God will help you to view all women as being not objects for desire but important creations of God; etc, to that effect. It is rather disheartening that they suggest that prayer is not going to be as helpful as people think it will because they are wrong to say that!
There is a lot of information describing the problem, how it starts, how it progresses, the attitudes involved, what to think and not to think, etc. But not enough is suggested in stopping the problem. Thus, whereas the book is good for "Young men" it is not going to be 100% helpful to guys already habitually addicted to masturbation or porn. The book lacks a bibliography and supportive citations for information on such things as the chemical impact of masturbation, addiction to sex, oxytocin, etc. Rarely does the book even provide references to medical things. Sexual addiction carries with it chemical complications which make it very hard to just stop masturbation: like use of a drug, if masturbation is cut the person will have withdrawal effects biologically and the book doesnt really explore these issues.
Otherwise, the book is all in all still very helpful! I would STRONGLY SUGGEST to all readers of this book to also read "If you really loved me: 101 questions on sexual purity" by Jason Evert and "Real Love" by Mary Beth Bonacci. In addition to these book all of the information provided in them is an arsenol to strengthen anyone in the battle for sexual purity.


Well... Their heart was in the right place but......   September 9, 2003
 50 out of 63 found this review helpful

I admire Steve and Fred's honesty, and I rejoice in their own success in battling sexual sin, but there method of approaching this subject I believe wasn't helpful at all.

They got quite crude at times in language, and even sensuous in their discussion of their past sins, and ultimately I had to put the book away because it was just too graphic. I was extremely disappointed to have to do so, because this is a subject that must be dealt with, and truly is a struggle for teenagers and I know this personally.

There were times when the book took on almost a confessional aspect to it, as though fred and Steve were confessing their past sexual sins to us the reader just so we would know them. It was nice that they saw it to be so important to let the reader know that where he or even she struggles is where they themselves have been before, but the detail was too much.

There are stories of one night stands in which the author states that he slipped out of his clothes and into bed with some girl, and blatant description of certain women that he has lusted over and what the particular image was that caused him to lust.

This book became a topic of prayer for me that I would read it and not begin to lust after the images they painted in my head while reading, and finally I put it away because I couldn't.

Never fear though Joshua Harris has just released a book called Not Even a Hint or something like that that deals with this same subject in a "PG-rated" way. I have ordered myself a copy and expect it to be quite good as his other books have been.


Silly, poorly written, and full of bad advice   December 2, 2002
 29 out of 90 found this review helpful

A poor, poor choice for young men trying to find solid advice on building healthy relationships with the opposite sex. This book attempts to use Victorian standards of gender relationships to replace the words of the Bible, to create what the authors deem "modern day Christian values." The authors utter lack of knowledge about the Bible leads to their pitiful interpretation of Biblical principles concerning sex and sexual conduct. This lack of knowledge is the foundation of the problems with the book's premise. (For example, the authors hack on avoiding "sexual immorality." To a first-century Jew of the Bible like Paul, the phrase "sexual immorality" would include any physical contact with a woman not a man's wife, including shaking hands, and any contact whatsoever with a woman who was menstruating, even if it was his wife.) Given this, it is clear that the challenge is to properly interpret the meaning of Scripture for our day; instead, the authors use it as an invitation to overlay historical American "values" (ie, things that demean women, making them less than men) in the place of Godly standards.
The badly done interpretation is only part of the failings of this book, however. While preaching total purity in regards to pornography of all kinds, the authors present some unconscious raciness of their own: when describing his "decadent past" one of the authors lovingly relates in graphic detail the Playboy centerfolds he once sinfully perused ("I can still see the nude Playboy model cloaked in a clear plastic raincoat as the shower cascaded over her...every detail, right down to the curvature of her spreading thighs are imprinted on my brain"). Imprinted indeed- perhaps a little too much. It's almost as if the author's intent is to titillate their young audience.
The recommendation that a man should ask a father's permission before proposing to his daughter is equally inane, and reflects the author's true attitudes about women echoed through the entire work: that they are property to be owned and controlled by men.
One is unlikely to find anything helpful in this book, unless the intention is to shame a young reader into the belief that his normal sexual thoughts and desires are God's little trick to send us all to hell.