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| Love the One You're With | 
 enlarge | Author: Emily Giffin
Publisher: St. Martin's Press
Category: Book
List Price: $24.95
Buy New: $12.90
You Save: $12.05 (48%)
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Avg. Customer Rating:  155 reviews
Sales Rank: 53
Media: Hardcover
Edition: 1
Number Of Items: 1
Pages: 352
Shipping Weight (lbs): 1.3
Dimensions (in): 9.2 x 6.2 x 1
ISBN: 0312348673
Dewey Decimal Number: 813.6
EAN: 9780312348670
ASIN: 0312348673
Publication Date: May 13, 2008
Availability: Usually ships in 1-2 business days
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Product Description
How do you know if you’ve found the one? Can you really love the one you’re with when you can’t forget the one who got away?
Emily Giffin, author of the New York Times bestselling novels Something Borrowed, Something Blue, and Baby Proof, poses these questions—and many more—with her highly anticipated, thought-provoking new novel Love the One You’re With.
Ellen and Andy’s first year of marriage doesn’t just seem perfect, it is perfect. There is no question how deep their devotion is, and how naturally they bring out the best in each other. But one fateful afternoon, Ellen runs into Leo for the first time in eight years. Leo, the one who brought out the worst in her. Leo, the one who left her heartbroken with no explanation. Leo, the one she could never quite forget. When his reappearance ignites long-dormant emotions, Ellen begins to question whether the life she’s living is the one she’s meant to live. At once heartbreaking and funny, Love the One You’re With is a tale of lost loves and found fortunes—and will resonate with anyone who has ever wondered what if.
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| Customer Reviews: Read 150 more reviews...
 Andy's nice and all, but I would totally bang Leo. May 29, 2008
61 out of 78 found this review helpful
I am an Emily Giffin fan. I am an unabashed, unashamed Emily Giffin fan. Her books pull me in the way a good date does, attracting me with a glossy exterior but keeping me interested by revealing a surprising depth.
LOVE THE ONE YOU'RE WITH contains the usual smart, charmed female protagonist living in a rather romanticized version of New York. But, in the first chapter, Giffin does something different. She introduces us to the main character's tempting dilemma - a charged encounter on the street with a hot, old boyfriend - before even telling us her name.
The character's name is Ellen. She's so analytical that she's practically obsessive compulsive. And she spends a lot of LOVE THE ONE YOU'RE WITH debating what she should - and should not - do about her cute, sweet husband Andy and her smoldering, brooding, dark and troubled ex-boyfriend Leo.
While Ellen's happy with Andy, she keeps thinking, "What if?"
This is the central problem of many a novel, but Giffin manages to hook the reader in with - dare I say it - some of the most erotic, intriguing flashbacks to Ellen's former relationship with Leo.
The husband Andy is a charming character, but, in Ellen's shoes, I would totally bang Leo. Giffin writes him as though he exudes sex through his eyes, through his pores. It's all very hard to resist.
And, it must be said, the inclusion of those scenes alongside many snarky references to my hometown of Atlanta kept me very entertained.
Strangely though, instead of flying all the way through it as I usually do, I flew through to Chapter Ten or so, then found myself taking a small break from it to concentrate on other things. Around the time that Ellen went to the charming, stylized Atlanta for the first time and then to photograph rock star Drake Watters, I was intrigued again.
After that, I was pulled back into the book every time that Ellen's sister Suzanne, a minor character with an edgy point-of-view, appeared on the page, though, for she was the voice I most related to in the long course of the book.
The core family of Ellen's in-laws at the center of the book, though, didn't always have my sympathies. In life, I tend to find those sorts of blessed, charmed, passive-aggressive, let's-put-on-a-smile types suspicious. Giffin makes was a very, very interesting move to have Ellen not just marry a man like Andy, but marry into her best friend and sister-in-law Margot's family. Giffin's excellent at exploring the dynamics of female friendship, and the Ellen-Margot friendship is satisfyingly complicated.
When Ellen is perplexed by her ex, she loses her chief confidante in Margot, for Margot's loyalty might go to her brother when news of what Ellen's secrets might come out.
The changing alliances of the marriage brings out Ellen's insecurity about her place, her feelings about her mother and how her own family must've felt intimidated and outmatched in comparison to the Grahams. Great, great stuff.
Of course, the protagonist Ellen might divide readers, for Ellen's in what many women would consider an ideal, supportive situation with a rich, successful and essentially sweet husband, loving in-laws, a nice house, a good career and such. Some readers might approach the book with the outset of "What the hell is she doing even thinking about infidelity when she's got it made?" But, once again, Giffin impresses by putting her protagonist squarely in the middle of what, at face value, seems like an indefensible position and manages to make her real, charming, vulnerable, reasonable and a heroine worthy of my attention as a reader and even my heart. Ellen, shockingly, considers infidelity for what feels like very valid reasons involving her heart and her choices.
It's a very smart book.
 Real love is about using the heart AND the head! May 20, 2008
40 out of 51 found this review helpful
Not my favorite of Ms. Giffen's books, but interestingly, it is the book that I have been most able to relate to. I understand Ellen's need to understand and process, and ulimately resolve, the difference between the love she feels for her husband, and the love she feels/felt for her ex. I think that the book's realistic yet affirming take on love marriage and commitment is a welcome read for the so called "chick lit" genre.
At the same time, I lost patience with Ellen by page 75. By page 158, I was almost angry with her for taking so long to figure it out. By page 215, I simply vowed to finish the book by the end of the day, and get it over with. Lucky for me, the ending was sweet, and everyone that mattered was happy.
I think the problem is that there was not enough action and plot, and most of the characters -- the ones that I most wanted to learn about -- were kind of flat and one-dimensional. Overall, a good read, and I will buy Ms. Giffen's next book the week it comes out as well.
Loved Love the One Your With May 14, 2008
29 out of 37 found this review helpful
I have really enjoyed all of Emily Giffin's novels but this one was far and away my favorite. Ellen, the main character, finds herself leading a more charmed lifestyle than she ever imagined and begins to wonder if there can be too much of a good thing. I know it sounds like she would be a little hard to empathize with but like so many of Giffin's heroines Ellen is instantly relatable and you fall right in step with the way she thinks. Because she is so identifiable you also find yourself (like Ellen) trying to justify what may not be right. The story takes a lot of twists and Giffin throws in moral hiccups to muddy the waters of right and wrong. I rooted for and against about every character at some point and changed my mind over and over again. Bottom line I felt very involved in the novel which for me always constitutes a good book.
 not that good May 17, 2008
25 out of 53 found this review helpful
I am also wondering why this book got so many positive reviews, and claims that it's Giffin's best work. It really isn't.
Ellen is a very unlikable character. for one thing, she is really indirect and not straightforward with anyone. also, most of the "plot" is a description of what is going on in Ellen's head. and since I didn't like her at all, I also didn't like most of the material here.
It was OK. that's what I'd say about it. Giffin is a lot less good than she used to be.
I hope she gives us something other than endless agonizing from an unlikable character in her next book. b/c Baby Proof was a lot like this. the difference was that Baby Proof dealt with a real dilemma (the choice to have or avoid kids). This book - the only conflict was that Ellen, as other reviewers have said, really needed to grow up.
and I didn't think the ending was at all realistic either.
Huge disappointment and a truly unlikeable heroine June 17, 2008
24 out of 39 found this review helpful
Ellen never got closure when her boyfriend Leo disappeared from her life. Years later she has moved on and has the perfect marriage with lawyer Andy, the brother of her best friend and college roommate. Or so she thought. One day she bumps into Leo on the street and wonders what if... An innocent cup of coffee soon has Ellen questioning her choices from the last several years, particularly when writer Leo manages to get photographer Ellen assignments that will bring them together.
I typically love all things written by Griffin, but this one really took a long time for me to finish because I could not sympathize with such a selfish and indecisive heroine, as she spends the 300 pages wallowing in what if's. There is little action - just lots of time spent with Ellen and her meandering thoughts. I just wanted to tell her to quit with all the introspection, get over it and move on. Griffin is becoming a definite library loan.
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