From the perspective that modern mothers—almost without exception—simply do not possess the necessary skills, this miscellany provides the requisite knowledge with which a lady may efficiently produce and raise a child while maintaining an unruffled composure. From conception in How to Produce a Son and Heir and adolescence in How to Lace up Your Daughter to the essential How to Break a Child’s Will and the bizarre in How to Avoid the Delivery of Monstrous Babies and Rabbits, this book provides a much needed tongue-in-cheek antidote to the plethora of perfect parenting manuals and self-help programs. It is an indispensable tome for new and expecting mothers!