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| Sex God: Exploring the Endless Connections between Sexuality and Spirituality | 
 enlarge | Author: Rob Bell
Publisher: Zondervan
Category: Book
List Price: $14.99
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Avg. Customer Rating:  96 reviews
Sales Rank: 1453
Media: Paperback
Number Of Items: 1
Pages: 208
Shipping Weight (lbs): 0.6
Dimensions (in): 7.7 x 5.7 x 0.7
ISBN: 0310280672
Dewey Decimal Number: 248
EAN: 9780310280675
ASIN: 0310280672
Publication Date: July 1, 2008
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Product Description
God and sex go together. You can’t separate the two, says Rob Bell, because this physical world is intimately linked to deeper spiritual realities. And so, in order to make sense of sexuality, at some point you have to talk about God. With beauty and unusual insight, Sex God explores this connection.
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| Customer Reviews: Read 91 more reviews...
 This and That March 3, 2007
136 out of 174 found this review helpful
First of all, this book is not so much about that, despite the title. The title almost immediately sets you up for an anti-climactic rest of the book. The title is good marketing, but not necessarily truth in advertising. This is ok. Buying this book is not about that.
Think about why you bought it first. You bought it because you really like Rob Bell, and in your mind you run through conversations that you'd like to have with him when you two are hanging out at Starbucks, which I'm sure he'll have time for. Given that that's what this is about, just realize that you're getting the next best thing. You're hanging out with him. He's talking about what's on his mind. You get to listen in. Even though it's a monologue, it kind of scratches that itch that all of his fans have been having.
So for that reason, it's a pretty good book.
In keeping with the postmodern, emergent ethos, which Bell leads while disavowing, the book is not linear. He starts out with a provocative introduction which broaches the sacramental without using that word, and then a powerful first chapter that reaches into our deepest longings for the dignity for which we were created. Immediately we are on board and want more. Particularly in hopes that he gets to the s-e-x.
The second chapter skirts around our "disconnection" from the created order, which makes me wonder if we're walking through a systematic theology of creation, sin, salvation (I was soon dissuaded). I'm also wondering if we've taken on a neo-Tillichian doctrine of sin-as-victimization, but I don't think the book's theology is quite so intentional.
The third chapter I like even better, as a modern discourse on the first three chapters of Genesis and the thoughtful suggestion that our sexuality is poised between our place as animal and angel, as physical and spiritual beings. Now I'm really into this book. Chapter four plays with the temptations and addictions that throw us off course from that dignity we wanted at first. Chapter five looks at our reaching out for love to fix the hurt, portrayed through the clever and playful illustration of a little girl running away from Rob Bell when he asked her to dance in Junior High. I think we're supposed to say, "Oh, good choice, girlie, look where you'd be now." The cross is God's act of making himself vulnerable to our rejection in the same way.
Now here's the break. From here on out, the structure is not too clear to me, and, from what I read, to other reviewers. Six is about couples needing to submit to each other rather than women to men. Seven is (subtly) about retaining the mystery of sex within marriage. Eight is about loyalty, nine is an implied analogy between heaven and marital intimacy, and ten is an offer of forgiveness for those who have failed.
Then I realized what I was reading. It's not systematic theology; it's the emergent "Why Wait?" program. Which is fine. I just wanted to hang out with Rob Bell, and when I got the chance, he had sex on his mind. Cool. I like listening to him, whatever he's talking about.
My only two suggestions for his third book are these. First, the endnotes are not cute, and it is not impressive to see how many books you can recommend. They perforate a book that already requires attention. Secondly, pensees do not need to be released in hardback at twice the cost of a paperback.
Those aside, it's a worthwhile recommendation for the religiously exposed who don't really understand Christian mores regarding physical intimacy.
 Of limited interest to non-Christians October 20, 2007
73 out of 96 found this review helpful
As a non-Christian, I found this book puzzling. Not sure who the target audience is: adolescents? adults? I like thought-provoking books of various theologies, but this one annoyed me.
The author starts anecdotes and doesn't finish them. In Chapter 1, there's a touching story about a prostitute who comes to the pastor with detailed suicide plans, and she wants to know if she's going to heaven or hell. It is revealed that she has a daughter named Faith, so the pastor feels a connection with the suicidal prostitute. And that's the point of the story.
But as a reader, I didn't care about his epiphany, I cared about the prostitute herself. Did she live, or die, and does the pastor even know? A lot of the illustrative stories are like this. The point is made in the author's mind, he whams you over the head with it like it's going to be as significant to you as it was to him, and then the flesh-and-blood person behind it is forgotten.
Choppy. Writing. Here are some example of entire paragraphs:
"Happens all the time."
"And the eyes."
"Him submitting to her."
Sorry, but this is juvenile and fake-hip. Bad writing. Doesn't make you. Relevant.
Finally, the author's theology of sex can, I believe, be summed up in thusly: Animals don't have spirits; they are bodies without spirits. Angels don't have bodies; they are spirits without bodies. Humans have both spirits and bodies, so we mustn't treat sex as just physical or just spiritual. (Then he points out how being celibate can demonstrate a life of high sexuality.)
Back to Blue Like Jazz: Nonreligious Thoughts on Christian Spirituality, a book I enjoyed much more, a book where the author reveals his own struggles and doesn't just pick out snippets of other people's lives to illustrate his points.
Confused about Sex June 29, 2007
67 out of 111 found this review helpful
I wrote the following about an excerpt from this book, which was posted at www.Beliefnet. If it represents the entire book, there is trouble ahead.
Do you want to be sexy? Pastor Rob Bell, prominent in the Emergent movement, thinks he can help you. He has written an essay called, "How to Be Sexy," which is taken from his new book, Sex God. The elasticity of the word "sexy" in has come to concern me of late, and reading Bell exacerbates this concern. He redefines the word to mean connectedness of a bodily sort, as when he is swimming with his son on his back amidst a pod of dolphins. (How one arranges these exotic--and for Bell, erotic--events is beyond me.)
He speaks of committed and celibate Christians as "sexy" because they are connected to ministering to the poor and oppressed. He laments that mere sex--such as sex on demand on Holland, where prostitution is legal--is not really sexy. Then he says: "You can't be connected with God until you're at peace with who you are. If you're still upset that God gave you this body or this life or this family or these circumstances, you will never be able to connect with God in a healthy, thriving, sustainable sort of way. "
This is exactly backward in several ways. One comes to God on God's terms, as revealed in the Bible: repentant faith in Jesus Christ and ongoing sanctification by faith after one is justified by faith (Ephesians 2:8-9). (Bell says nothing about the Bible, which is all too common in contemporary Christianity; it is biblically impoverished, and thus full of self, experience, memoirs, and hype.) We don't find some erotic connection to the universe--through dolphins, concerts, or otherwise--and then connect with God thereby. God is not the creation, but transcends it (while being present in it). Yes, God is the giver of every perfect gift and the designer of sexuality (Genesis 1-2). We are not Gnostics, but should celebrate the creation (on God's terms). But we come to God because he is God, and because he can transform us to do God's will, whatever that might be.
Bell to the contrary, sexuality does not encompass all of the sensual. That is a category confusion of the highest magnitude, and would only be suggested by one besotted by the contemporary sexualization of everything. Taking communion is sensual in the sense of tasting and ingesting real wine and real bread (at least in the better services), but there is nothing sexual about it. If you think there is, there is something wrong with you.
Moreover, those who suffer from chronic illness or who are put in nearly impossible relational situations cannot be blissfully "connected" (what an overused and underachieving word that has become) to their circumstances. Instead, they, like many biblical writers and characters, must lament--lament their broken bodies, lament their fractured relationships, lament the political chaos of their African countries, lament that 300 million in India are "untouchables" (the Dalit people). They call out to a listening heaven because earth has become a living hell. This "disconnection" has produced some of the deepest and richest spiritual beings on the planet. For example, how "connected" was John the Baptist to his culture or to "the sensual"? He was an ascetic for one thing: his diet was sparse; his clothing rough. He had little social adhesion. But he spoke courageous truth to power and paid the highest price imaginable: his head ended up on a platter before a ruler. Jesus commended him with strong praise (Matthew 11:1-11).
Bell's "spirituality"exalts the sensual over the spiritual and then transmutes the sensual into the sexual. If that is what "being sexy" means, let us find another teacher. See Titus 2:7-8.
 Sex God Is Terrible May 8, 2007
59 out of 87 found this review helpful
I am so mad right now. Rob Bell is so far off the mark it's stunning! People who go from friend to friend, group to group have a "sexual dysfunction"? Give me a break. Not only is his use of language muddy and barely thought out, he shows his COMPLETE ignorance of the primary title subject - and I'm not talking about SEX. I'm talking about God.
This passage INFURIATES me: From page 46: "You can't be connected with God until you're at peace with who you are. If you're still upset that God gave you this body or this life or this family or these circumstances, you will never be able to connect with God in a healthy, thriving, sustainable sort of way. You'll be at odds with your maker. And if you can't come to terms with who you are and the life you've been given, you'll NEVER (emphasis mine) be able to accept others and how they were made and the lives they've been given. And until you're at peace with God and those around you, you will continue to struggle with your role on the planet, your part to play in the ongoing creation of the universe. You will struggle and resist and FAIL TO CONNECT. (Me again)
B.S! And the WORST kind of B.S! This is the "You need to get it together to really BE with God." crap we fight night and day. I, for one, connected with God daily when I was in the middle of hatred towards myself and nearly everyone else in the world. IT IS EXACTLY BECAUSE GOD WAS PRESENT WHEN I WASN'T AT PEACE WITH WHO I WAS THAT I AM A CHRISTIAN TODAY. This kind of idiocy disempowers every single person sitting in a 12 step meeting at this very moment, struggling to come to terms with where they are and how God fits in, and for that I am ready to throw a beating on Rob Bell. And it makes me sick coming after page 45 where Mr. Bell tries to slough off institutional sin with his "Institutions don't hurt people. People hurt people" crap. I present two items into evidence: Nazi's and New Orleans. Anyone who was anywhere near either event will speak vividly about how institutionalized ideas about race and identity destroyed everything. It was more than just a couple of "bad guys".
Grow up Mr. Bell. It's a complicated world out here - sexually and otherwise.
This is a book by young person who has a lot more living to do before he writes anything else.
Danger, Will Robinson, Danger!
 Awesome Look at God and Personal Intimacy March 15, 2007
49 out of 76 found this review helpful
I agree with other reviewers that the title of the book is misleading (whether this is a reflection of crafty marketing or Rob Bell's uber-creative whimsy is debatable). This misnaming is unfortunate, because I think it confuses the reader (myself included) as to the overall goal of the book. However, a simple addition of a "/" renders the title more accurate: "Sex/God." As Bell emphasizes in his introduction, "This" (sexuality, intimacy, marriage,) is always about "That" (God and his loving relationship with humanity).
When read this way, I think the book becomes more coherent and compelling. In fact, I think it is one of the most inspiring theological statements on love, marriage, and intimacy that I have read. Rather than the typical, predictable, shallow Christian answers to defend traditional marriage and sexual purity, Bell provides a sweeping vision of how our intimate relationships reflect the self-giving love of our Creator. Not only that, but our self-giving love for one other person actually helps to manifest God's love to many other people. Even the pain of a failed relationship reflects the pain God feels and the risk God takes by loving us humans. Bell challenges us to think of sex, intimacy, and marriage in the most holy and reverent - yet also in the most realistic and practical - of ways.
Through all this, "Sex God" cleverly and somewhat subtly tells us as much about "God" as it does about "Sex." While we think we are reading about human relationships, we find ourselves learning about the Gospel - God's supreme love for us, manifest most explicitly in the sacrificial love of Jesus. "This" is really about "That."
"Sex God" is biblically grounded, yet never in predictable ways. I always enjoy Bell's trademark usage of vivid cultural context. His exegesis on the early chapters of Genesis and the latter verses of Revelation were particularly interesting, and he provides new insights to many well known passages.
I also appreciate Bell's concluding pages, which show sensitivity to people who are not married or dating without sounding patronizing. After spending an entire book extolling the Godly virtues of giving yourself wholly to another person, Bell reminds single people that, according to Jesus himself, they actually have a higher calling than the rest of us. And he also offers hope to people who have experienced failed and abusive relationships.
Much more could be said here, but suffice it to say that I am very eager to share this book with both my teen child and the college students with whom I work. And I immediately assigned the book to a couple for our premarital counseling sessions. "Sex God" is that good.
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